Don't Fear The Foreskin

/
 

Congrats on your whole baby!

You have just made one of the best decisions you will ever make as a parent. Now you’ve broken the cycle of circumcision and kept your child’s penis intact.

What do you need to know?

If you’re like a lot of parents in the United States, you’ve had well-meaning relatives, friends, or maybe even doctors tell you that the foreskin is going to cause your child problems.

They might insist, “It’s better to get them circumcised right when they’re born so they don’t have to have it done in adulthood,” as if it’s an inevitable fate. (It’s not.)

It’s almost like they’re reading from a script, because the comments always sound the same. I assure you, this belief that “foreskin is scary and dangerous” is nothing more than urban legend.

U.S. society has become so accustomed to cutting off the valuable foreskin that we have lost the collective knowledge of what it is for and how to take care of it. Think about it: no one needs to give you lessons on how to care for a newborn’s genitalia when that newborn has a vulva, but most people in the U.S. are clueless about what to do when a newborn has a penis.

With 70% or more of the world’s men/penis owners being intact (not circumcised), we are the exception. Most of the world knows what to do — and what not to do — with the foreskin. As one friend put it, “fussing over foreskin” just doesn’t happen in other cultures.

Most of the adults in the world have foreskin and are quite happy with its associated benefits. While the majority of current U.S. adults with penises were circumcised at birth, you can find many happily intact adults here, as well. 

Thankfully the number of intact people in the U.S. is growing as more parents are sifting through fact and fiction and realizing their society’s beliefs are based on a history of sexual oppression rather than evidence-based science.

You need to know that leaving your child’s body whole is not a scary, radical decision. The foreskin is not a ticking time bomb, and you do not have to live in fear of it causing problems. It is a normal, functional part of the body. Just as most people in the U.S. don’t fret about whether to keep all portions of child’s vulva at birth for “health and safety,” there’s no need to worry about your child keeping all the normal parts of their penis.

“Hoping for no issues whatsoever with your son’s foreskin is a bit unrealistic, just like it would be to expect that your daughter would never have so much as a diaper rash. Genitals of all sexes can develop minor issues that are easily dealt with naturally or with modern medicine if you prefer. No preemptive removal of genital tissue is required!”

— Alexis Rockwell, YWB Development Director

Normal and Easily Treatable Occurrences in Whole Bodies

[Image description: Decorative sign that looks like a pencil, with the text “Love to learn” painted on it.]

Redness and Irritation
Can foreskin get red and irritated? Certainly. So can the vulva. Genitals are not immune to the irritants of the environment. Be sure to examine possible external environmental causes such as bubble bath, change in diapering routine, etc. In addition, keep in mind that parts of the external genitalia in people of all sexes — like the tip of the foreskin and the clitoral hood and labia — often have a healthy flushed or darker appearance due to the presence of many blood vessels.

Sideways Urine Stream/Spraying
Does everyone with a penis urinate in a perfectly straight line? Certainly not, nor does everyone with a vulva. As long as urine is flowing freely, you’re in good shape.

Smegma
Smegma occurs in all humans — including male, female, and intersex — and in many mammals, as well. It is a natural, harmless substance. When your child’s foreskin is still fused and non-retractable, smegma might look like a white lump underneath the foreskin. These smegma pearls are not harmful, and nothing needs to be done about them. As your child gets older and becomes retractable (current research puts the average age of natural retractability at around 10 years, with a lot of variability), they will be able to rinse under their foreskin, much like teenagers and adults with vulvas rinse away smegma during a shower or bath.

Ballooning
This may sound (and look) strange at first, but ballooning is a normal part of penile development, much like menstruation is a normal for someone with ovaries and a uterus. Ballooning can happen while the foreskin and glans are going through normal stages of separation — don’t forget that they are typically fused together for the first several years of life. In ballooning, urine swirls around the head of the penis before exiting the tip of the foreskin, giving the foreskin a brief “ballooned” appearance during urination.

Infections
Might your child’s penis get a yeast infection? It could happen. (Circumcised penises also can get yeast infections.) Your child’s vulva/vagina might, too. Luckily, there are simple treatments for yeast infections that work for all humans.

Is your intact child going to get a UTI? Though not likely, it’s possible — both intact and circumcised children can develop urinary tract infections. A lot of UTIs are caused by preventable external factors such as bubble baths. Females experience UTIs at a significantly higher rate than males. Ultimately, such infections treated the same way for people of different sexes. Common effective preventive measures and treatments include increased hydration, cranberry juice, antibiotics, and breathable clothing.

One Warning

There is one potential issue involving the intact penis that you need to fear: unknowledgeable caregivers and healthcare providers forcibly retracting (pulling back) your child’s foreskin before it has separated naturally from the glans (head) of the penis. Forced retraction can cause serious issues including bleeding, infection, and scarring. Hands off the foreskin. It doesn’t need to be moved around at all until your child is old enough to move it around themselves. Educate yourself thoroughly on preventing forced retraction. (Notice: That really wasn’t anything scary to do with the foreskin. It was about scary people wanting to manipulate your child’s genitals. Foreskin isn’t a problem, but misinformed care providers are. If you encounter such a medical professional, please let us know.)

Say it with Me: “Foreskin is My Friend”

As a mom who previously knew nothing about intact penis care but who is now two and half years into my adventures in boyhood, I cannot stress enough that foreskin is just not a big deal. It’s just there, like a toe or a cheek. I don’t worry about it or think about it any more than I worry about my son’s ears.

Because I was once on the outside of the enigmatic “raising an intact boy” scene, I recognize that you may not truly understand how easy it is until you experience it yourself, but please, do not fear the natural human body. Do not over-think your child’s penis any more than you would your child’s vulva and vagina, or your own genitals. Of course you should pay attention to your child’s health, but you should also be confident that danger is not lurking around every fold of skin.

Taking care of an intact child is as easy as taking care of a hardy plant. Pour some water on them from time to time, then sit back and watch them grow.

Welcome to #GenerationIntact.

Jen Williams is the founder of Your Whole Baby and parent of two intact kids. She is passionate about many causes, including the human rights violation happening to children around the world.